Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Exposing Myself AGAIN
Today and every day until I move is NOT the day for retrospection...is that a word?...well it is today dammit!
I am going to walk blindly day to day, until I have some piece of mind to think and do as I please. Y'all think I am playing....but I had to write this one little glimpse into something that COULD HAVE turned into a serious thought had I not put a lid on it...........
I was reading my buddy Var's blog and I took an excerpt from it...for several reasons...
ONE being that he writes his ass off and if I knew that it wasn't just the fact that he can meld words together like a wordsmith, put them together to make my heart smile and my panties wet...then I'd fly to LA and wrestle that brotha down and make him mine forever.
TWO because the statement is REAL... I mean it's real if you feel it and even real if you don't. But acknowledgement goes a long way.
...." so that when she mentions she's gotta a husband the next time, she'll say it with pride rather than regret. Because having a woman recognize you as her everything has got to be the most beautiful gift a man could ever experience"...
THREE I did this! Just the other day. I went to the car wash to get DipSets truck cleaned. While I was waiting a guy comes and sits next to me and starts making small talk....the kind I'm not good at, don't wanna hear, and since I think DS is having me followed...I don't need no man sitting with me out on a nice sunny day and talking to me....LOL...sorta
So he asked me which was mine and I pointed at the black truck...."wow, that's alot of power for a petite woman like you".... {He's an ass.} "it's not mine." "Oh, it must be your man's, do you have a boyfriend?"
Why did I take a deep ass breath before saying "Yea". I hadn't realized how down, depressed it sounded until he said....
"Sorry to hear that...and from what it sounds like, your sorry to have one!"
I didn't say anything else.
I just waited for Jose to finish putting the armoral on the tires...I got up and went to the truck...got inside....put my seatbelt on...looked back at dude....and then took another deep breath and drove off.
Thing about it, I didn't want dude. Wasn't attracted to him. But his comment just made me think.......
"you have no idea."
...then I just went about my business and forgot about that trivial banter until I read Var's post. Even now as I type it.....I am not thinking about it.....I know that's hard to understand but...when something weighs to heavily on your mind...you CAN make sure it stays at surface level until your ready to delve into the deep, to see how far it goes....
I am going to walk blindly day to day, until I have some piece of mind to think and do as I please. Y'all think I am playing....but I had to write this one little glimpse into something that COULD HAVE turned into a serious thought had I not put a lid on it...........
I was reading my buddy Var's blog and I took an excerpt from it...for several reasons...
ONE being that he writes his ass off and if I knew that it wasn't just the fact that he can meld words together like a wordsmith, put them together to make my heart smile and my panties wet...then I'd fly to LA and wrestle that brotha down and make him mine forever.
TWO because the statement is REAL... I mean it's real if you feel it and even real if you don't. But acknowledgement goes a long way.
...." so that when she mentions she's gotta a husband the next time, she'll say it with pride rather than regret. Because having a woman recognize you as her everything has got to be the most beautiful gift a man could ever experience"...
THREE I did this! Just the other day. I went to the car wash to get DipSets truck cleaned. While I was waiting a guy comes and sits next to me and starts making small talk....the kind I'm not good at, don't wanna hear, and since I think DS is having me followed...I don't need no man sitting with me out on a nice sunny day and talking to me....LOL...sorta
So he asked me which was mine and I pointed at the black truck...."wow, that's alot of power for a petite woman like you".... {He's an ass.} "it's not mine." "Oh, it must be your man's, do you have a boyfriend?"
Why did I take a deep ass breath before saying "Yea". I hadn't realized how down, depressed it sounded until he said....
"Sorry to hear that...and from what it sounds like, your sorry to have one!"
I didn't say anything else.
I just waited for Jose to finish putting the armoral on the tires...I got up and went to the truck...got inside....put my seatbelt on...looked back at dude....and then took another deep breath and drove off.
Thing about it, I didn't want dude. Wasn't attracted to him. But his comment just made me think.......
"you have no idea."
...then I just went about my business and forgot about that trivial banter until I read Var's post. Even now as I type it.....I am not thinking about it.....I know that's hard to understand but...when something weighs to heavily on your mind...you CAN make sure it stays at surface level until your ready to delve into the deep, to see how far it goes....
# posted by Blah Blah Blah : 1:11 PM
