Monday, August 14, 2006
Is It That Hard?
One more song about moving along the highway/Can't say much of anything that's new/If I could only work this life out my way/I'd rather spend it being close to you/But you're so far away/Doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore/It would be so fine to see your face at my door/Doesn't help to know you're so far away/Yeah, you're so far away
~Carol King
On one of my 4 dates this weekend, I was sitting across from him wondering...
what the fuck am I doing?
I am literally spending time with someone just because: 1. I was hungry 2. I was bored.
There are 2 people I soo want to spend time with and I can't. One lives in another state and the other was at work. So...idle hands...
We actually were having a very pleasant brunch when he asked one of the no-no's of dating...
"Where do you see this going?"
"Ya know, I hadn't really thought too much about where this was going because I haven't known you long enough to know whether I want this going anywhere."
He didn't like my answer. Matter of fact, I think it was a hypothetical question and I jumped the gun by answering.
*shrug* Oh well.
"Well Bloopty baby, I am really diggin you and your so not like NY women. It's refreshing. Your open and your a little silly but in a grown sexy woman way. I am not ashamed to say, I want to see you again. I want to see alot of you. I am not a dating type of man. I am a relationship type of man. So, if your not ready to try and establish a realtionship with me, then I am telling you now....I am going to date other people because I am looking for a commitment...................?"
You all know that I think I am the shit, right? Yet, I know that my shit is not that sweet smelling for him to flip a relationship speech on me! Well it is....but not the 2nd date into the game!
So, after his lil...shpeel...I was sorta trigger shy on whether I should answer this question....was it a question? I mean he just sorta left it hanging... Am I supposed to pick it up?
"Well babe, your free to date whoever you want and should you have time in there for me...then great, if not...then that is fine too."
The look he had on his face.....I knew he wanted to shove my face into my plate. Eh...whatddayagoin'do? I answered in the best possible way to get the point across in the best possible way for him not to misunderstand.
He then sits there in silence munching on his food with this ...thoughtful look on his face. Yea, I could see him thinking and from where I sat...it looked like he was argueing with himself.
"So what your telling me is that I am not your type and that this is the last time I am going to see you?"
"Where in the hell did you get that conclusion? Did you not understand what the fuck I just said?"
You see y'all...unless we have a playful friendship between us...I don't cuss at a man. Yet, by this point I wanted to drop the subject of whether I wanted him for my fucking husband.
THIS DATING GAME IS NOT BRAND NEW TO US!!!!!
Why am I having this conversation with a 40 year old man. Dude, you've been dating longer than I have...you know you have committed dating suicide...why are you pushing the point of "commitment"?
I have effectively turned him off, made him mad....but I ate good y'all.
"Bloopty, if you were having a bad date....what would you do to end the date?"
Umm, is he really asking me for a good exit-line to use ON MYSELF?
"I am not much into using pre-contrived lines to get out of something....I am (unfortunately) pretty upfront about what I want and don't want. So, I'd tell "the person" that I was ready to go home."
Dating has always been fun to me... I like variety. I like meeting different people and having "different" conversations. You know when your with the same person...you tend to talk about all the same stuff. No real brain energy needed to talk about how your day was, how was work, the gossip amongest your mutual friends, what's going on in the news. There's no simple nuances of flirting because you have no reason to flirt with the one you've already got. It's like you run out of creativity...drive to come across as sexy. That "fire" that made up your witty come-backs, the sexy talk that has sexual undertones...remember when you were considered funny and not annoying? That's why being single for me is cool. Right up my alley.
I know when your in a relationship or married you re-invent your realtionship and true, it's something different...but it's not sexy anymore...it's every day...it's typical...it's what becomes expected. No real surprises and no real earth-shattering moments of extreme LIKE. I can hear the married people rumbling and in discontent....but I was married for 9 years...I've been in 2 long term realtinships... I know what I am speaking about........for me. Unless you have something brand new come into the marriage...like kids...your just livin'. Kids will shake shit up and make your otherwise boring and dull marriage into daily hilarity...yet, what if you don't want kids? I know this is extreme...but I'm just sayin'
I'm looking at this guy and I am hoping.....I don't want to be desperate at 40...wondering if I am still beautiful to men. Trying to bogart them into a relationship after the 2nd date. I hope that I age gracefully, I hope I still have my little bit of spunk to me, I hope that I am sexily sassy, I hope that my conversation then is as it is now...a little clever, a little witty and a whole lotta enticing. As for me getting married again...marriage will be out of necessity rather than some ground-breaking revelation of love. Security in my old age is what I want but...if I end up being alone and living with 50 cats...I think I may just be ok.
He drove me home...on the way, we stopped at the farmer's market and I bought some fruit. Before I got out of the truck, I thanked him for brunch and told him to have a nice day. As I turned to walk away, he asked me if we were going to speak again....I looked over my shoulder with a sassy smile and said....
"Only if you call me."
Then I went in the house and decided I should rest before the next one began....he didn't enter my thoughts for the rest of the weekend.
...until he called me last night...while on date #4. I didn't answer. I felt no need to answer. He irritated me.
~Carol King
On one of my 4 dates this weekend, I was sitting across from him wondering...
what the fuck am I doing?
I am literally spending time with someone just because: 1. I was hungry 2. I was bored.
There are 2 people I soo want to spend time with and I can't. One lives in another state and the other was at work. So...idle hands...
We actually were having a very pleasant brunch when he asked one of the no-no's of dating...
"Where do you see this going?"
"Ya know, I hadn't really thought too much about where this was going because I haven't known you long enough to know whether I want this going anywhere."
He didn't like my answer. Matter of fact, I think it was a hypothetical question and I jumped the gun by answering.
*shrug* Oh well.
"Well Bloopty baby, I am really diggin you and your so not like NY women. It's refreshing. Your open and your a little silly but in a grown sexy woman way. I am not ashamed to say, I want to see you again. I want to see alot of you. I am not a dating type of man. I am a relationship type of man. So, if your not ready to try and establish a realtionship with me, then I am telling you now....I am going to date other people because I am looking for a commitment...................?"
You all know that I think I am the shit, right? Yet, I know that my shit is not that sweet smelling for him to flip a relationship speech on me! Well it is....but not the 2nd date into the game!
So, after his lil...shpeel...I was sorta trigger shy on whether I should answer this question....was it a question? I mean he just sorta left it hanging... Am I supposed to pick it up?
"Well babe, your free to date whoever you want and should you have time in there for me...then great, if not...then that is fine too."
The look he had on his face.....I knew he wanted to shove my face into my plate. Eh...whatddayagoin'do? I answered in the best possible way to get the point across in the best possible way for him not to misunderstand.
He then sits there in silence munching on his food with this ...thoughtful look on his face. Yea, I could see him thinking and from where I sat...it looked like he was argueing with himself.
"So what your telling me is that I am not your type and that this is the last time I am going to see you?"
"Where in the hell did you get that conclusion? Did you not understand what the fuck I just said?"
You see y'all...unless we have a playful friendship between us...I don't cuss at a man. Yet, by this point I wanted to drop the subject of whether I wanted him for my fucking husband.
THIS DATING GAME IS NOT BRAND NEW TO US!!!!!
Why am I having this conversation with a 40 year old man. Dude, you've been dating longer than I have...you know you have committed dating suicide...why are you pushing the point of "commitment"?
I have effectively turned him off, made him mad....but I ate good y'all.
"Bloopty, if you were having a bad date....what would you do to end the date?"
Umm, is he really asking me for a good exit-line to use ON MYSELF?
"I am not much into using pre-contrived lines to get out of something....I am (unfortunately) pretty upfront about what I want and don't want. So, I'd tell "the person" that I was ready to go home."
Dating has always been fun to me... I like variety. I like meeting different people and having "different" conversations. You know when your with the same person...you tend to talk about all the same stuff. No real brain energy needed to talk about how your day was, how was work, the gossip amongest your mutual friends, what's going on in the news. There's no simple nuances of flirting because you have no reason to flirt with the one you've already got. It's like you run out of creativity...drive to come across as sexy. That "fire" that made up your witty come-backs, the sexy talk that has sexual undertones...remember when you were considered funny and not annoying? That's why being single for me is cool. Right up my alley.
I know when your in a relationship or married you re-invent your realtionship and true, it's something different...but it's not sexy anymore...it's every day...it's typical...it's what becomes expected. No real surprises and no real earth-shattering moments of extreme LIKE. I can hear the married people rumbling and in discontent....but I was married for 9 years...I've been in 2 long term realtinships... I know what I am speaking about........for me. Unless you have something brand new come into the marriage...like kids...your just livin'. Kids will shake shit up and make your otherwise boring and dull marriage into daily hilarity...yet, what if you don't want kids? I know this is extreme...but I'm just sayin'
I'm looking at this guy and I am hoping.....I don't want to be desperate at 40...wondering if I am still beautiful to men. Trying to bogart them into a relationship after the 2nd date. I hope that I age gracefully, I hope I still have my little bit of spunk to me, I hope that I am sexily sassy, I hope that my conversation then is as it is now...a little clever, a little witty and a whole lotta enticing. As for me getting married again...marriage will be out of necessity rather than some ground-breaking revelation of love. Security in my old age is what I want but...if I end up being alone and living with 50 cats...I think I may just be ok.
He drove me home...on the way, we stopped at the farmer's market and I bought some fruit. Before I got out of the truck, I thanked him for brunch and told him to have a nice day. As I turned to walk away, he asked me if we were going to speak again....I looked over my shoulder with a sassy smile and said....
"Only if you call me."
Then I went in the house and decided I should rest before the next one began....he didn't enter my thoughts for the rest of the weekend.
...until he called me last night...while on date #4. I didn't answer. I felt no need to answer. He irritated me.
# posted by Blah Blah Blah : 3:53 PM
